Embracing Joy and Grief in Adoption: Brandie Thomas's Faith-Filled Journey and the Power of Storytelling

 Join us on a heartfelt journey with our cherished guest, Brandie Thomas, as she shares her incredible story of adopting her son Elijah. Through the lens of vulnerability, Brandie opens up about the simultaneous joy and grief that adoption brings, offering a raw, emotion-filled insight into her struggles with infertility and the divine orchestration of her journey.

Writing her chapter for an anthology became a healing process, allowing Brandie to explore the depth of her faith and how surrendering to God's plan strengthened her relationship with Him. The candid reflections on open adoption, unmet expectations, and the power of storytelling make this a conversation you won’t want to miss.

We also explore the unexpected inspiration that led to Brandie authoring her personal chapter, capturing the emotional complexity and hurdles of the adoption process, including the nuances of writing in unexpected places and the mix of emotions at events like baby showers.

Brandie's experience emphasizes the profound impact of community and the power of sharing stories as a catalyst for personal growth and leadership. Whether you're navigating your own spiritual journey or seeking to embrace your divine purpose, this episode promises to inspire and encourage you to share your own story.

Don't forget to connect with Brandie on her website and social platforms, and join us next week for more discussions on faith, leadership, and personal growth.

Get Restore My Soul Here

Enjoy the episode, everyone!

How you can be part of the movement to equip women.
1. Share the podcast!
2. Leave a 5-star review!

Here are the best ways for you and me to connect and grow together!

Step 1: Subscribe to the Podcast
Step 2: Check out my mentorship for under $150/month here
Step 3: Let's Connect: https://www.lemonprice.co/coffeechat

"For even the Son of Man came not to be served but to serve." Mark 10:45

Thanks for listening!

If you enjoyed this episode, be sure to share this in your stories and tag me! And don’t forget to subscribe, rate, and review the podcast.

CONNECT WITH LEMON:

• Facebook
• Instagram
• Visit the Website
• Get on a call
• Join the Community

Chapters

• 1:07 Unveiling the Proverbs 31 Woman
• 13:58 Journey of Sharing Personal Stories
• 18:44 Spreading Wisdom and Growth

Transcript

Speaker 1: 1:08

Hey, I'm Lemon. I am just like you, sister friend. Talk about stepping into that overflow that God has for us by becoming those ultimate Proverbs 31 women. Hey, I'm Lemon. I am just like you, sister friend. I knew God had something more in store for me, but I couldn't see a way out of the laundry piles and, frankly, I resented that. Proverbs 31 woman. How was I going to live up to the hype? That is until I found out how to really step into becoming this Proverbs 31 woman through leadership development. In this podcast you're going to find financial freedom, leadership, growth and motivation so you'll be able to do all the things God has called you to do with ease and really step into that land of milk and honey.

Speaker 1: 1:49

Welcome back to the Milk and Honey podcast. I'm your host, lemon Price, and today I'm so excited because I have one of my favorite people on, brandy Thomas. She's been on here before. You guys know her, you love her. She is my sister that I didn't know I needed and one of my closest friends, and I'm just so excited to have you here. So thanks for being here, brandy.

Speaker 2: 2:10

I always love having on your podcast, and anytime I get to talk to you it's's like a joy in my life.

Speaker 1: 2:14

I wish you guys could see the 17 different conversations we always have going on at one time actually it's funny because Glenn and I were talking about this last night. For those of you who don't know Brandy was sending me mass amounts. We will each send each other reels on Instagram on a regular basis, like daily, but then we also have a different conversation going on in Telegram and we'll have a different conversation going on like texting, and then we'll call each other and have a completely different conversation there's always multiple conversations going on and Glenn last night he was like what are you doing?

Speaker 1: 2:45

He was like you guys, you guys all need help. How do you keep track of all of the different conversations you guys have going on? And I was like we just do.

Speaker 2: 2:59

I think my favorite is when we text each other and then we'll switch over to.

Speaker 1: 3:01

Instagram within the same five minute conversation. Literally. It's so funny. You guys would love to be a fly on the wall of our conversation. It's like we're. We're like a fun time. I'm not gonna lie to you.

Speaker 1: 3:10

I think we're a fun time but I'm excited because I got to know you in a slightly different context over the summer, which is exciting. So Brandy was part of our super fun anthology that we put out, but I wanted Brandy to come on and talk about her story, her chapter and why she picked those specific things. So, Brandy, do you want to give us a little insight to the chapter that you wrote?

Speaker 2: 3:32

my friend insight to the chapter that you wrote, my friend Sure. So my chapter was about leading up to the adoption and the actual adoption of my son Elijah, and so I was discussing the duality of the joy of that journey and also the heartbreak and trauma and all the difficult emotions that also come in line and stop with that joy. So it was a lot of duality of emotions, of happiness and grief at the same time, and then also just sharing parts of my story that I had never really verbalized to anybody and, yeah, it was definitely a grieving journey for me. Actually, writing my story out was very therapeutic and I literally cried writing the first half of my story. I woke up at 4 am at a hotel room between my husband and son and was just like typing away. I just needed to get it out.

Speaker 2: 4:33

God had given me the son and it was just like typing away, I just needed to get it out. God had given me the words, so I was like all right, let's go.

Speaker 1: 4:41

I love that. I love that you said it was like a grieving process to like writing this chapter, Because I feel like I don't know. Do you feel like it was like cathartic to sit and put this, put all of your feelings like pen to paper?

Speaker 2: 4:56

Or I don't know, keyboard to Keyboard to Google Doc, yes, just like getting. I am a writer and I like to journal and I've written other things and so getting the words that had been ringing in my mind for so long like actually out definitely was helpful. And I think it was hard to go back and process that time that I went through with myself, with God, with my faith, and like the wrestling and the surrendering and all of the things that come with your infertility and adoption journey. There's so much, just like we have an open adoption, so just navigating that, as in in the beginning, that's beautiful, like I love our open adoption and our story is like really beautiful. Just walk on, just divinely orchestrated every step and turn about it.

Speaker 2: 5:47

Then when you're in it, it's like really hard because you don't know when the next thing's gonna happen. Happen in your there is like a really dark period, like literally in my memories it's just blackness and it's just like me and god jesus that's all I can say about that. She's like so much darkness and it's just me wrestling with god. Then like things like started to happen really fast.

Speaker 2: 6:09

So it was just cool how, looking back, seeing our timeline to adoption was actually very short, like it was less than a year process, but in the middle of it, you're like every day feels like a year and the waiting you're not just waiting for a child, you're also wrestling the unmet expectations, the unmet timelines, the fear, your own insecurities, and so that was a lot of what I was personally battling in my faith at that time with God of just like just laying it out, lying and not being a good Christian girl and actually showing up and like I am kicked off.

Speaker 2: 6:49

I actually saw one of your quotes and I am in the background. It's like Jesus, you can just kick rocks with open-toed shoes. And I'm like, yes, that's exactly how I feel, right in the background. It's like Jesus, you can just kick rocks with open-toed shoes and I'm like, yes, this is exactly how I feel right now about Jesus and I love that's such a deep part of my story because it was really what I learned Like I was big enough for my emotions and the hard questions and the imperfection and the brokenness and he just was there, holding me the entire time. It's such a beautiful representation of the relationship that I have with him now.

Speaker 1: 7:18

I love this and I love that you're vulnerable in the chapter two to be like, yeah, like I was angry with God, Like I'm mad at Jesus, I think, and I like to that you're like, listen, I put this like good Christian girl thing aside. I did a whole podcast episode on the good Christian girl persona and it's okay to be like God, like I'm really angry right now or I don't understand, and I think it's okay. I don't think enough people say it's okay to be mad at God. I don't think it like changes necessarily the relationship in a negative way. I think it's honest, right, Like I can tell my husband I'm mad at him. I can tell other important people in my life that I'm mad at them. Why couldn't I go to God and be like are you angry about this situation that I'm in?

Speaker 2: 8:07

yeah, I was not, it was a turd. I was kicking, punching, cussing and I just the picture was just like God, with his arms open, and I'm just like punching his chest and like going at it with them. And then it's like when you're if you've ever parented or witnessed like a kid just like kicking and screaming and then finally they just melt into like the arms of the person that hopefully is there, safely there, to protect them. That's what it felt like. It was like god was just my dad, out with my dad, and I was just being so angry and upset with what he was doing to me and then I just melted into his arms because I was like you're also who I need in this moment.

Speaker 1: 8:52

I love that. Okay. So where are you at like with God and this fertility journey and the adoption Like? Where are you at now Because Elijah's running his own show now to be?

Speaker 2: 9:02

honest.

Speaker 1: 9:03

If you got Elijah, it's so funny. He's 100% going to be a worship leader someday or something, because he's always singing and praising Jesus and he's a whole blown like worship pastor. So like, where are you at now, like with God, and like, how is it different? Did it change your relationship with God in the present by like reflecting on your journey? Good question several.

Speaker 2: 9:25

At this point we're like eight plus years now into our infertility journey and Elijah's four and a half, and so it almost cut like part of me almost felt like four years now have gone by and I'm still at the same place in the waiting, and so I'm actually going through a whole nother grieving journey and I've hired a great counselor who's amazing and we do a lot of deliverance work with that as well. So I would just say, if you're a Christian, find a Christian counselor who's also prophetic and deliverance, because it just makes your healing journey like so there's just so much freedom that I'm gaining from doing some of the prayer work that we do in our sessions with forgiveness and then also just literally going into spiritual warfare, battle and breaking things off my bloodline. Raising Elijah honestly triggered a lot of things inside of me that were unhealed and parts of my story that were just unheld and I didn't hold space for. And so I'm on a level 2.0 healing journey with my fertility because I think God has more in store for me. But again, it's just like before we can adopt Elijah, I had to go into this space of surrendering and he had to heal some broken parts of me and it's okay. We got through that level of healing and now you couldn't handle the full healing at that time.

Speaker 2: 10:55

I think sometimes God can, like he can take the leprosy away, he can heal the broken leg, he can do the healing in the immediate, but I feel like your character and emotional healings tend to agree to take longer because he is literally, if you look at the disciples right. He didn't take peter's anger away, he didn't like take his outbursts away and one moment it was a character development. It was in the relationship that peter became that disciple that god knew. He was at the very beginning when he first stepped off the boat. And so it's been like that for me with my journey of just okay, we're going to shield in this area and now that part's done let's go to the next level because there's deeper roots and just things in your life and in your story that we weren't able to address this.

Speaker 2: 11:50

And so I feel like I'm at a level in my healing where we are getting down to the roots of things and we are pulling things out and I'm taking that authority and dominion over my healing and over fertility and it's really cool because I think God is leading me into the gift of healing over different aliens and session for bearing women, and he's had me pray for pregnant women and there's been two women that have actually gotten pregnant and I'm not saying it was my prayer alone, but it was just really cool to me to be like God prompted me to pray over these wounds and then they were pregnant. So it's really cool from that perspective. But again it's like why is that working for me? So there's still, I think, grieving and healing that needs to occur personally, but it's also really cool for God to start revealing I'm going to use you for bigger things and I'm taking you through this journey because you need to have authority over these spaces.

Speaker 1: 13:04

I'm so proud of you for just the work that you've done and the vulnerability too, and like your chapter was really vulnerable and Molly always says that like your story is meant to be mentorship for somebody else, and so I love that you're taking this fertility struggle that you guys are having and then using it to go and bless other people and praying for other women. Like that. It's hard right, like I get it. I'm also like I have no biological children. I won't have biological children because of my hysterectomy. And sometimes it's hard, like when, like your best friend is pregnant or like your sister is pregnant and you're like God, like why not?

Speaker 1: 13:36

Okay, so I would love to know, because this was the the first book that we put out, with ka too. So what was that experience? Like for you my friend because we did it fast. Yeah, when did we start that, may I think it was the beginning of may. Yeah, started that project. It was a really fast turnaround time, like four months total so I would love to know your experience in that whole process.

Speaker 2: 13:58

Going back to the very beginning. When I got with Nicole to see what this new project was about, I was like, oh, nicole, I'm not going to do this, I've already done the anthology, been there, done that, checked it off my bucket list and I was just praying God, what would I even write about? I mean a comedy thing. And then he just dropped elijah's he's like elijah into my story. I think I even texted you after we were probably texting, actually while the call was happening and then a bunch of crap just happened in my life. Of course, like when you decide to do something, like just crap, it's so off. So I was like dealing with that. And we got it all sorted out with michelle for me to join the project because there was different requirements that you had to meet and I was able to meet those requirements and we worked out a unique way for me to do that.

Speaker 2: 14:45

The writing part was honestly easy because I already knew what I was going to write about. You have 4,500 words or so and I had been thinking about it in my head, so I already knew how I was going to start the chapter. My husband was away for a work trip and he had his own hotel room. So Elijah and I just kind of tagged along on that journey and I just felt the spirit just like waking me up, get this out now, grab a laptop, write it down, like it was, to the point where it was just in my head so much I just needed to physically get it out. And so I wrote. I don't even know. I wrote at least like probably a page or two that first morning. I just had to. Emotionally I was literally bawling. I remember I was like are you okay? I was like go back to sleep, leave me alone. And then I just sat down and finished the story, because the rest of the story wasn't, it was just more of the chronological timeline and sharing how the adoption came to be, like just how the crazy way that God divinely orchestrated every step of it. So I'd say the beginning story was probably the hardest part for me to write.

Speaker 2: 15:56

And then there's another part where my family throws me a baby shower and that was really awkward for me personally, and so that was probably another harder part for me to write, just because I never showed those emotions right.

Speaker 2: 16:12

Baby showers are supposed to be happy and joyful and you can't be crying while you're opening presents and oh, by the way, how weird is it to be opening presents for a baby? So there was a lot of internal, I think, struggle and insecurities that I was dealing with in that moment, but I didn't share with people because I didn't want people to feel pity me or feel bad for me and I didn't want to ruin the experience because people generally were so excited and wanted to just love me and support me, and so the intentions were good. But again, this whole story is the duality of juggling, the duality of this beautiful moment the string come true while also holding space with. This is not how it's supposed to be and there's something unnatural about this and there's a loss here at the same time that I'm having a game. So, yeah, I think, just trying to weave and really explain the duality that I was experiencing, that was my goal. I just wanted to try to bring that into writing.

Speaker 1: 17:22

I'm really proud of you, friend, and you guys should read her chapter. It's so good. I had somebody who was on the launch team and she said I read yours and Brandy's chapter and it's so good and it's so moving. I got a bunch of texts about how good your chapter was from launch team people. So I am just I'm so proud of you, I'm so proud of this project. Where can everybody go to connect with you? And I will leave a link for you guys to buy the book. Just go get it.

Speaker 1: 17:49

It's so good.

Speaker 2: 17:51

I would say probably just my website, which, let me, can drop in the show notes because it's a mouthful, but it's victoriousentrepreneursrisingcom, and that's where you can just get all the things that I do. And then, if you want to follow on social, I'm on Facebook as Brandy Thomas and that's Brandy with an IE, and Instagram is at live victorious. But those are pretty much the two places I hang out currently.

Speaker 1: 18:24

Yep, I love it. Go and hang out with her. She's fabulous and talks about all these like very deep and intense things, which shouldn't surprise you, given her chapter. So thank you for being here, friend. Again, I'm so insanely proud of you for just sharing this story and the way in which you told it was beautiful, and I just am so grateful that you were a part of this project. Thank you, hey friend. What a joy it has been to share today's journey with you.

Speaker 1: 18:45

If you found a spark of inspiration or a nugget of wisdom that resonated, would you bless someone else by sharing this episode with them? It could be the encouragement they need to step into their purpose and calling. Also, if you could spare a moment to leave a review, it would mean the world to me. I really appreciate your feedback and it really helps our community grow. Remember, the road to discovering God's call for you isn't one you have to walk alone. So join me again next Monday for another episode where we'll continue to explore the depths of leadership and the heights of our heavenly calling. Until then, keep seeking, keep growing and keep trusting in his plan. God bless you and I'll catch you on the flip side. Bye, friend.